A Secret to Maintain Your Joy During the Holiday Season: “One Life”
As I write this I am sitting looking at a picture of my beautiful mother. Today would have been her 88th birthday. While I miss her with every breath of my being, I am thankful she is no longer suffering. Yesterday I spoke with someone who is approaching the 1 year anniversary of the death of their spouse, sudden and unexpected. Sadness and pain confounded on top of the sadness and pain of their absence during the holiday season. Difficult and consuming! I still cry and for me it is been 12 years. How do you move through the loss of a child, a spouse, a parent, a relationship, a job, of hope? You take a deep breath and remember it is okay to be wherever you are. There is no right or wrong. Cry your tears and let them flow. It is okay, it is part of the healing process. Remember that it is healing to talk about them and keep them present. For the first few years after my mother died I would sit her picture on the counter as I was cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Somehow I felt comfort in doing that, it kept her present. Do whatever you need to function as long as it is restorative and not depleting. It is healing. Limit how much time you dwell in sadness as it can be consuming. Remember that there are others who still need you. Press forward for your loved ones that remain and lead by example in the midst of your pain. Here is a secret strategy to keep your flow when approaching sadness and despair: “One Life”. Find one person when you find yourself diving downward to do a simple act of kindness. Speaking a “good morning” to someone with an avoidant blank stare, an encouraging phone call, an encouraging touch or word are acts that have amazing power! I smile as I see people look up shocked but obviously pleased as their whole countenance changes. Not only does their spirit brighten, so will yours! It is an absolute guarantee! The holidays are approaching and the reality for us all is that it bittersweet. I am forever comforted in my belief in God’s promises that I will see my beautiful mother again. I cherish that hope! Until that day, I carry my beautiful mother with me in a sacred place in my heart. My faith always brings me back to a place of peace. Wherever you are and whatever you are experiencing remember the power of “One Life”. Whether missing a child, parent, grandparent, a spouse, a sibling, a friend. Whether missing traditions that are forever gone, take the “One Life” challenge and let me know. By touching one life at a time, it makes your journey toward healing one day at a time so much easier. We never get over grief, we never completely let go, we learn to move through. The “One Life” challenge: try it! It will give you breath, peace, and yes moments of joy as you forever cherish old memories but smile as you move toward making new ones. “One Life” a simple act that never fails to lift me up during the lowest times. “ One Life”: A powerful mantra I have adopted that moves me toward peace and helps me find joy in the midst of the most difficult day. Happy Thanksgiving! Many blessings as I send you all thoughts of joy and peace as we open up the gift of this day.